Whose Responsibility?!?
November 1, 2005
Warning: This post is mostly a rant with not much educational value. If you’ve read any of my other posts, or personally know me, then you are aware that I work for DCYF. I was recently speaking with a client who implied that it was my responsibilty to help her. Despite my repeated attempts to explain to this person that my responsibility was to look out for children, not their parents, this individual did not seem to understand. It got me thinking back on several of the families that I have been involved with in the past. I realized that for quite a few families, at least one of the parents implied that it was my responibility to make sure they were safely parenting their children. So, I would like to know when it became my responsibility to clean houses, make sure that children are supervised while their parents go out partying, or pass out high on whatever drug they could get their hands on. When did it become my responsibility to make sure parents have housing and food. Since when did the responsibility for these basic necessities shift from being a parental responsibility to being a governmental responsibility? Of course it is my job to assist families, and to make referrals to community resources, but if parents are unable to follow through with these resources, or are unable to find a place to live or food to eat or figure out how to clean their houses, then they are at fault – I am tired of being blamed for parent’s irresponsibility. We all have to live up to expectations in life, and if we are unable to meet basic expectations, such as keeping our children safe, then we have to face the consequences. Just once I would like someone to say to me “yeah, it was my fault, I made some mistakes and my kid wasn’t safe, I’m sorry.” Some parents realize this throughout the course of a an on-going case, but I don’t handle those cases, so I never hear those statements.
Hi, I just noticed a web “hit” from your site, glad to meet you. You say:
Just once I would like someone to say to me “yeah, it was my fault, I made some mistakes and my kid wasn’t safe, I’m sorry.�
Unfortunately, if a DCYF investigation goes to court, I’m certain that “I made some mistakes and my kid wasn’t safe” will make it into the record. The American judicial system is an adversarial system and Paula could be sanctioned by the Professional Conduct Committee if she recommended a client say that. So, don’t expect to hear it Paula’s clients.
By the way, the “Tricks of the Page” is my page,
not Paula’s. I’m a software engineer, not a defense lawyer.
Paula’s pages are at http://nhdcyf.info .
Hi Eric, glad to hear from you. When I wrote this post, I wasn’t indening to say that I was hoping for clients to accept responsibility in a court of law, I would just like to hear someone say it to me – anywhere. As an assessment worker, I hear lots of denial and excuses. Often times at the end of a family service case, families will come to realize that some mistakes were made, and express this to their worker, but I never hear those comments.
Since you have totally removed the Misconceptions page in your blogs, I must place my comment here. After reading your website, I must question that if you are so righteous in your quest, why are you afraid of the Werme’s? And why is DCYF right only 66% of the time as per court testimony? Who would defend the other 33%, DCYF?
When did it become my responsibility as a citizen and as a parent to take on the battle for Family Rights? Is it my responsibility to see to it that Social Workers are properly trained to make life altering decisions? When do I get to hear a SW admit that they were wrong? That the Parents were innocent and that the child who was unjustly pushed into foster care may now have life long issues because of the mistakes of a headstrong stubborn case worker that refused to see the truth. It became my responsibility when I saw the number of children snatched and sold for monetary gain by the very agencies that were suppose to be protecting them. It became my responsibility as i watched the number of child deaths in foster care increase. Just once i would like to see a case worker held accountable for lies told to the court in order to remove a child from its family or to convince the court to terminate parental rights. Just once i would like to see a SW who is a caring individual that truly has the best interest of the child at heart and shows this by working with the family as a whole to improve the quality of life in the home. We do not want you to clean our homes,or raise our children for us. We are capable of this ourselves. Sometimes we may need help. We should be able to come to you without fear of our children being snatched a sold to the highest bidder. We want you to earn the tax dollars we work so hard to pay you with. You want the Parents to step up to the plate and take responsibility. Well we want you to do the same!