Xander Week 19 – Tummy Time Troubles
January 24, 2007
I don’t know how many other parents experience this, but Xander hates “tummy time”. Developmentally most places say he should be able to do a little baby push up, and maybe even roll over one way by now. But every time I put Xander onto his tummy, he just cries. He can lift his head, but mostly he just flails his arms, and cries, face down. I have tried everything I can think of – we’ve got different mats with interesting things on them – one even has water with some colorful animals in it. I’ve tried rolling up a receiving blanket and putting that under his chest so that his face isn’t planted into the ground. I’ve tried laying next to him so that he can see me, or putting him on a couch or chair and sitting underneath him so he can see me. I’ve tried flipping him over after diaper changes, but then the changing table that he used to love started to make him cry whenever I put him on it, so I stopped that. So, I’m out of ideas.
Monday when we took Xander for his 4 month checkup, I asked our pediatrician about it. He asked us to put Xander on his tummy on the examination table, and I was certain that Xander would let out a wail as soon as we put him down. Instead, Xander simply picked his head up, pushed up with his arms and smiled at the doctor. He stayed on his tummy for almost five minutes without complaint! Xander was particularly fascinated with the disposable pad that was on the examination table, so we took one home, hoping that this would entertain him. So, the next day I put the disposable pad onto the changing table (as close to an examination table as you’ll find in my house) and plopped Xander down onto the pad, expecting that he would “perform” as he did the day before. Instead, he began to cry almost immediately. I let him huff for a few moments before picking him up, and frustrated, gave up on “tummy time” for the day. I am entirely out of ideas, and now I’m starting to worry that our kid won’t ever learn to roll over or crawl because he can’t stand to be on his stomach. He doesn’t even like lying on his stomach on me or his father anymore (we used to be able to get in some faux “tummy time” that way in the first 2 months). So, if anyone has any suggestions, I would love to hear them, because I’m out of ideas 
It sounds as if you have tried toys, implements, different positions…you have probably expended almost every possiblility. It must offer some solace that Xander was able to perform for the doctor. It sounds as if he can, he just doesn’t want to just yet. I bet it will come with time, he just might let you know when he is ready.
It isn’t completely hopeless Sara. He did like the first few minutes of last night’s tummytime. Remember it took about two mintues before you could even get an upset picture.
Maybe he is just a bizarre baby who only does things to show off how he won’t listen to you. Like how he did it at the doctors, and when you were going to take a picture of him being upset.
It fits!!!
-Auntie Jenny
My son (6.5 weeks) also hates tummy time – he looks so miserable from the get-got that I pick him up immediately. I figure if it were that important, he would instinctually want to do it. His head isn’t flat and he gets plenty of stimulation using his arms and head. I also figure that Tummy Time is a ‘campaign’ more geared toward parents who are more inclined to let their infants lie on their backs for hour after hour without stimulation… Im ther words, trust your instincts and don’t worry. Xander will let you know what he needs when he needs it.
Thank you for the encouraging comments
Things have been getting better – very slowly. Xander is patient with the tummy time for about a minute or two now before he starts crying. I think I need to remember that Xander doesn’t need to be ahead of the curve on everything, and if he’s not ready for tummy time play yet, then I’ll just have to be patient and keep trying until he is… Thanks again!
Hi there! My baby tolerates tummy time for very limited periods, but we do a sort of faux tummy time too. When I carry him, rather than carry him with his head in my shoulder, I wrap my arm around his waist and press his butt into my stomach so he can see where he is going. He leans forward just a tad, but he has learned to hold his head up straight when he is held this way. HE LOVES walking around that way and prefers to be held that way now. It helps him with the whole tummy muscle and head/neck muscle growth, and then I don’t feel so guilty when he doesn’t get the tummy time he needs.
Hi Mary – thanks for the suggestion – I can’t wait to try it out on Xander!
My son (13 weeks) HATES tummy time. He can totally push himself up by himself, but then starts hysterically crying and waving his legs like mad. I think that he is frusterated at not being able to move. Do you think that’s happening to your son, too?
Amelia hates tummy time, so I don’t put her down like that too often. She would cry the instant you put her down. Lately though, she’s been able to go longer on her tummy. She’s now 4 months old and tolerates it a little better. I also have a boppy tummy time mat that comes with a miniature boppy pillow that she props up on. That helps a lot. I say give it time…may when he gets a little older and has better head/neck control he won’t get so upset.
Hi Jackie, I’m hoping that Xander is frustrated at not being able to move. In theory, if he’s frustrated then he’ll eventually figure out how to move on his own. I’ll be interested to hear when you son decides that tummy time isn’t the worst thing in the world. Thanks for the theory – it’s a good one!
Hi Rayne, thanks for the encouraging words. I know they use a boppy pillow mat thing at day care with Xander for tummy time, and he’s very slowly starting to tolerate more, but when that means going from 15 seconds to 30 seconds before he cries, it doesn’t feel like long enough yet. I’m hoping he starts increasing that time at a quicker rate soon. His head and neck control are pretty good now, so hopefully he’ll start enjoying tummy time soon!
Sara,
my 3 1/2 month old son does the same thing!!! he can sit up with very little support, bear weight on his legs when held at the waist, and hold his head up for long stretches when i carry him, but he hates tummy time. i’ve been giving him small doses of tummy time since around 6 weeks. sometimes, he will do (after a diaper change or nap) on his baby boppy pillow, but most of the time he just cries or whines–face down. however, at his two month check-up, he performed for the doctor. when put face down on the examination table, he held his head up and looked around. i agree that he just doesn’t want to do it…it’s still frustrating, but i’m still sticking with tummy time in short doses. you’re not the only one with a stubborn son
Hi. I found your blog by googling “baby doesn’t like tummy time”. It seems that this is fairly common issue, but not as serious as it seems to be. My son is 6 months old now, and has always hated being on his tummy. But, we actually witnessed him flipping over starting at 2 weeks (he has pretty big muscles for a baby). Also, he’s a very smiley, happy baby, so it’s not a rebellion issue. He can also hold himself up on his arms, keep his head steady, and he just started to bounce up and down on his legs in the bouncer. He just doesn’t like being on his belly for some reason (I don’t blame him, I don’t either). Today, I put him down and he didn’t even try to flip over. He just cried. I’ve heard of babies skipping the crawling phase and going straight to walking. Maybe these babies just don’t like being face down? He never liked facing us when we hold him either. We always face him out, or make sure his head is above the shoulder so that he can look around. In any case, maybe we shouldn’t worry too much about it and just keep trying, since it doesn’t necessarily inhibit our babies’ physical development.
Hey Mom,
Thank you so much for sharing your concerns about baby Xander. my baby is 6 months and I am constantly stressing the tummy time as well. She can roll onto her tummy, but when she gets there it is only a matter of minutes before she starts crying. I have tried not to stress myself about it, because I know that I am trying to give her sufficient time on her tummy. Please dont beat yourself up. I time Angeni as soon as she rolls over.. she is up to ten minutes before total freak out. Remember that babies can sense your moods as well, so try not to pressure him. I know that he will be crawling as soon as you know it. When that happens then you will really go nuts!!! Good luck!
Sara, I have a 4 month old that acts EXACTLY the same as Xander. What works for my son is this, I fold my comfortor in half on my bed and then lay a body pillow on top of that. I then place him on top almost as if he were sitting on his knees. I then dance around acting very silly and singing for him for about 20 mins and he laughs and smiles the entire time. But I will say that if I stop for even a minute, he starts screaming again. But it is beneficial, because while he gets tummy time I get a 20 minute workout. Hope this helps.
Try putting him on your legs in the air, lie down, bring your knees up, put his body with head to your knees and his feet to your feet. My baby doesn’t like tummy time too, but he loves the ‘superman’ flying.
hi:
i would really like to know how you have done with tummy since you’ve written on your blog.
I am at the same place you were in and i am lost for any new ideas – she REALLY, REALLY hates tummy time.
thanks
Julie
Hi Julie, tummy time was never easy for us. Eventually we purchased that mat you see in the picture. If we propped his chest up high enough that he could see around, he would sometimes tolerate 30 seconds to a minute or so. Eventually around 7 months he learned how to roll over. This was huge for us. Once he was able to roll over, he wasn’t quite as irritated about being on his stomach. By 9 months he was crawling, and then all of our worries were out the window. Even though Xander really didn’t have much “quality” tummy time, he still learned how to roll over, and that was the first step towards mobility and much less frustration for everyone. I would suggest trying to prop your daughter’s chest up a bit – use rolled up receiving blankets or something similar. Xander seemed to be irritated that he could only see the ground in front of his face when he was on his stomach – even if we put him on the edge of a couch or bed. Propping seemed to help a bit. I also put him on the floor on his back, and that was eventually how he learned to roll over. Most importantly, remember that she will figure out how to move eventually – even with very little tummy time she’ll get it, and then tummy time worries will be a thing of the past. Good luck, and please let us know if you discover anything that helps your daughter with tummy time!
Hi. I found your blog by googling “baby won’t lay on stomach”. I don’t know what to do either. My son is 7 months old and still can’t stand being on his stomach. He’s a little chunky and I think that might contribute to it but he’s had colic since the day he was born and I wonder if the gas pain is worse when he lays on his stomach and has something pushing against it. He hasn’t rolled over yet but he loves to jump in his jumparoo and he is the happiest baby I’ve ever seen! I think he will be fine and your son will too if you just give him time. Don’t give up on him!
My son is 4 months old and he hates tummy time, but my hubby tried this and it seems to work.
Sitting on the floor strech both your legs to the front and put your baby on his tummy on the legs, the head should be facing your body, he lifted his head held it there for as long as he wanted and no cries.
This will definitely help strengthen his neck muscles.
But he doesn’t do push-ups with his hands when lying on the floor, so after this lying-on-leg excercise we put him immtly on the floor and tries to lift with his hands.
I am having the same problem with my 2.5 month old and the tummy time. He just hates it so much. He actually can barely hold his head up. The instant I put him down, he screams until I pick him up. What did you finally do to make him enjoy or tolerate tummy time?! HELP!!! I fear he will fall way behind because he will be 11 weeks this weekend and he doesn”t even ATTEMPT to lift his head, roll over, or push up with his arms. Please give me some tips. : )
hi. i found this page by typing in “make baby do tummy time”. haha… can you tell i’m desperate?
my son didn’t tolerate being on his tummy ever. he is now almost 7 months old. he will spend up to 5 or 10 minutes on his tummy now but only once during the day and this is not every day. at 2/2.5 months he would have nothing to do with tummy time. he would smother himself in the floor or mat or comforter and cry and cry and cry. we couldn’t even get 30 seconds out of him.
Peyton was a very fussy baby overall when he was younger. he was diagnosed with acid reflux based on his symptoms of arching and extreme fussiness all day (many parents think this is due to colic but colic occurs during a typical 2- 3 hour interval at the same time each day – usually in the evening; not all day long…) and i know that reflux babies are known to hate tummy time. but something still just didn’t sit right. to make an incredibly long story short, about a month ago i was able to have a swallow study conducted for him at a local children’s hospital. it turned out that my son was silently aspirating small bits of formula into his lungs with each suck of the bottle. NO WONDER HE HATED TUMMY TIME! his lungs probably felt like they were probably burning out of his chest!
his doctor temporarily put him on an iv with no oral feeds for about 2 or 3 days and it was like i had a new kid. we now have a feeding tube that we will use until he strenghtens his chest and neck muscles enough that it prevents the aspiration (hence why tummy time is still so important!). we now have a new obstical, though… now that he learned to roll at 6 months, he rolls off of his tummy as soon as he’s put there.
another mommy suggested using a portable dvd player or laptop to play baby einstein while he’s propped. hopefully that will make our time last a little longer.
i just wanted to post my experience here to point out that there are certainly times when babies just don’t like tummy time because it’s hard work… but if you have a gut feeling that there is something bigger getting in the way, don’t be afraid to ask and ask and ask for tests and knowledge and advice until you get to the bottom of it. if i had listened to some of my son’s initial doctors, he would still be in so much pain. you are your child’s best advocate!
good luck on everyone’s tummy quests! i know all of these kids are going to be running around before we all know it!
Try doing tummy time with the diaper off. Sometimes the diaper acts as a lever, making it even more difficult for the baby to push up. Maybe that is why tummy time worked at the pediatrician?
Hey,
I have a three month old with the same problem, I worry about it too. Don’t stress yourself out every baby is different, and our babies just don’t like to lay on their tummys. I do think that this is something that will get better in time. Good Luck!
Ha.
My son who is 4 months old is also named Xander.
HE also hates tummy time!
He did the same thing in the dr’s office.
He layed on his tummy, head up with no problems.
I cannot get him to do it at home….
Maybe it’s a Xander thing haha
Our 4 month old isnt doing well with tummy time either(or the mini- push ups) she should be doing according to al lthe milestone literature.
I have tried tummy time since she was 2 weeks old….1 minute at a time and gradually increasing(or at least trying to)….she gets so frustrated and starts to scream……and looks so miserable.
I get the most results only from putting her on our quilted mattress with no sheets, comforter….just the mattress….but even so 5 minutes max….and she is red in the face when I pick her up. Tried putting toys, laying beside her….our golden retriever is her best distraction…..
She can roll over onto her back….and does so as soon able so not to be on her tummy.
So spending my day serching online for any helpful tips….and keeping on trying! Her father did skip crawling and started walking at 7 months….so maybe she will do the same???
My son’s name is Matthew. He is 4 months and recently learned to roll over on his tummy. I spend a lot of time with him on a quilted large mat that I bought so that he exercises a lot. But now that he has learned to roll over, as soon as I put him on the mat, he immediatly rolls to his tummy amd just CRIES! It is driving me crazy!! What I don’t understand is that if he doesnt likr the tummy time, why does he constantly want to roll over on his tummy and gets upset and fights me to roll over. I try everyday, but I eventually give up and put him in his kicker or swing. i hate doing that because I feel that he isnt getting any exercise. Please continue to post ideas, I will try everything. Is anyone else having my same problem out there? I hope I am not alone.