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Posts Tagged ‘mommy’

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Another Beginning…

May 5, 2011

067Xander had his ‘Kindergarten Connection’ (screening) meeting yesterday.  After touring schools and weighing our options, we finally picked what we hope will be the best one for both boys.  The connection meeting went pretty well – they certainly have it organized and down to a science.

We walked into the cafeteria and went to the registration table.  Xander got a name tag and we got a giant terracotta pot.  There were 4 ‘stations’ set up, and we were directed to the 1st station where Xander played with one of the kindergarten teachers (they are big on magnetic letters) on a baking tray (cool trick since it’s magnetic) while we chatted with the principal.  They got to test Xander’s letter recognition and organization and we got some handouts (which we could carry around in our handy pot).  Xander got to pick out a seed packet (to plant in the terracotta pot) and we moved onto the next station.  At each station they evaluated things like gross and fine motor skills, following directions, etc. and we met with people like the school nurse, the OT specialist, reading specialist and teachers.  As Xander finished whatever task was in front of him, he was given some sort of reward (a beach ball from the health table, gardening gloves from the OT table, a drawing/counting game from the academics table, etc.)

When we left and I asked Xander how he liked it, he said ‘it was ok… but they didn’t have any dinosaurs for me to play with’  On the other hand, this morning he asked me where he was going to school today, and when I told him, his current school he made a face at me.  I asked him what the problem was – he loves his school and he informed me yes, but he wanted to go to kindergarten!  So, I guess any qualms I had over him being ready (the OT lady’s first comment when she met us was ‘wow, a little guy – he just barely meets the cut off!’) are moderately relieved since he’s pretty confident that he’s ready ;-)

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The Leash Debate

April 6, 2011

Apparently the current hot mommy topic is whether or not to leash your child. The ridiculously judgmental Erin Behan at Strollerderby doesn’t think you are a bad parent, but she does think you are lazy.  Before I had children, I agreed with Erin, and probably thought worse.  Then I had Xander, and after some work, he understood that we hold hands when in parking lots, etc.  It took some time, but we got through to him.  I didn’t really think much about leashes when Xander was a toddler.  We didn’t need one, but I didn’t scoff at people who used them.

Then we had Parker.  He has rocked our world.  In parking lots we have two choices: Hold a screaming, writhing mess of a Tasmanian Devil in our arms for the length of the walk, or let Parker walk on his own.  I dreaded picking Parker up from day care for about 4 months until I decided it was a battle I didn’t want to fight every afternoon.  I am not lazy Erin Behan.  I read books to my kid about holding your parent’s hand.  I talked with him, tried to reason with him, tried to bribe him, tried to encourage him.  I fought with him EVERY DAY for FOUR MONTHS.  That’s EIGHTY DAYS of attempting to teach my kid.  And I failed.  I failed miserably.  I’m certainly not going to put my kid in a stroller to walk the 20 feet from the day care door to my car every afternoon (and that would elicit some pretty painful screams as well).  I continue this battle in bigger parking lots, and gather stares from everyone within a 100 yard radius for the blood curdling screams coming from my child.  I’m out of ideas.  Encouraging doesn’t work.  Threats and punishment don’t work.  Reading books about good boys hasn’t worked.  Bribery hasn’t worked.  He’s two and the most stubborn child I have ever met.  If any child has ever been leash worthy, it’s Parker.

We don’t own a leash for Parker.  But, there have certainly been times where I wished for one.  These days, I get it.  I could be holding Xander’s hand, and walking with him when Parker bolts for the nearest puddle.  Xander can’t run as fast as me, so what do I do?  Do I drop my 4 year old’s hand in the middle of the parking lot and chase my 2 year old down?  Do I let my 2 year old run and continue on with the 4 year old?  There is no good solution.

I have a friend who took her two children on a plane by herself last year.  Her kids are the same age as mine, and her youngest has a very similar attitude as Parker.  She had leash backpacks on both of them at the airport, and if I had been in her position I would have done the same thing.  With everything you have to manage just for yourself at an airport, worrying about your kids darting off  is just unnecessary stress.

So, I’ll take this post back to where every mommy blog will end up eventually on this debate.  We’re all moms and we all make decisions that we think are best for our kids.  Lets stop judging each other and get back to supporting each other.  Erin Behan doesn’t have to use a leash on her kid, but she also doesn’t need to sneer at the parents who do.

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Far Too Long

March 31, 2011
I love chapstick - especially whey they let me put it on myself!

I love chapstick - especially whey they let me put it on myself!

It’s been far to long since I last posted.  I can point to a number of reasons for this.  Wordpress works funky on my iPad so I have to type everything in the excerpt box and then move it when I get to a real computer.  We haven’t uploaded new pictures to flickr for ages, and those usually give me inspiration.  The second child always gets shafted.  The milestones are still exciting, and while they are new for Parker, they are not new for us.  Couple this with the fact that he hates to have his picture taken and the result is far, far less blogging from Sara.

Our friend Jenny gave Parker some books (among other things) for Christmas.  One of the books is No No Yes Yes.  The first time I read the book to Parker, I had an strange sensation of reading it before.  We read through it again and I realized I had not read the book before, just lived every single No No page.  The book shows two pictures, a ‘no no’ and a ‘yes yes’ (no no dumping your food, yes yes eating  your food, etc.).  Parker does every single no-no in the book (except for pulling the cat’s tail).  He dumps his food, he plays in the toilet water, he pours water out of the bath tub (didn’t discover that one until it started soaking the carpet the floor below).  He runs away from us in parking lots, he hits his brother, the list goes on.  Read the No No Yes Yes book and you’ll get a pretty good idea of how Parker acts.

I love the kid to pieces, but he is just a naughty little boy about 65% of the time.  It’s harder to write about that stuff – I don’t want either of my kids to look back at this digital preservation of their lives someday and see all the glowing, loving posts about Xander and pages and pages of text about Parker’s latest behavioral flaw.  And yet, I constantly struggle to find the good posts, the ones where Parker sticks up for his older brother or tries to give me a fish kiss with a face covered in applesauce.  I’ll try harder to find the good stories along with the not-so-good to share, and I’ll try to carve a little time out of my crazy days to sit at a computer and write, and I’ll also try to upload more pictures to Flickr which will almost certainly make me remember lots more things to blog about.

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Choices

February 15, 2011

067We live in a small town.  I mean, really small.  When we moved in, we bumped the number from 84 to 91 people in town.  It’s small enough to not have a school.  Taxes pay tuition for local children to attend any school in the district.  So that’s kind of cool – we can pick any of the 7 schools to send our children to.  It was easy enough to narrow the choice down to two schools and now we’re stuck.  School #1 is in the bigger, regional town.  By high school all of the children in the surrounding town are fed into this regional high school.  It is also the town that both Zach and I work in.  It is the town where the boys’ doctors are located as well as their day care.  School #2 is also an excellent school.  It’s closer to home, they have a contract signed with our town so even if class sizes are big, they can’t turn our kids away, which is a small risk at the 1st school.  We’ve talked to parents with children in both schools, and everyone has had positive experiences at both schools.  My next step is to contact the schools and set up some observation time.

Ultimately though, it’s a choice between a smaller school that gets fed into a larger high school or starting out in the larger school system.  I went to kindergarten with the kids that I graduated high school with.  My high school years were pretty comfortable (aside from all that teenage angst and drama).  When I got to college I realized that I could no longer make friends by playing tag or kicking a kid in the shins.  I spent exactly 1 semester at UVM before going home, completely friendless.

Zach on the other hand started in a smaller school.  He had wonderful experiences with his K-8 classes and then attended the same high school as me (a year behind me).  For him it was awful.  He never completely fit in, and although he was a pretty good athlete, since he wasn’t part of the “in crowd” he never really got much of a chance to play.  High school was much more tumultuous for Zach.  He graduated 3rd in his class and when he arrived at college, he had no trouble settling in and making friends.

Now Zach and I are trying to figure out which experience to give our kids.  Where do we choose their struggle?  High school? College?  Which fits better with their personality and learning style?  They have such different personalities, how do we choose one school that will work best for both of them?  This feels like the biggest, most important decision that we will make for our children for years to come.  We are both worried about the decision.  I have calls in to both schools to visit the classrooms, meet some of the teachers and ask some questions.  We’re going to visit school #1 this week.  I still need to set up a time with school #2 (the assistant principal has been challenging to get on the phone…)  Like it or not, we’re going to have to make the decision sooner or later – and hopefully either way we choose it’ll be a positive experience for our kids.

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Busy, busy times…

December 12, 2010

Oh man have we been busy lately.  So here are a few Reader’s Digest Highlights:

Parker and Xander are both sleeping in their own beds in their own rooms through the night.  We get an occasional visit from Xander and Parker is usually up before the sun asking me what I’m doing, but I can’t really complain.

kitchen island

This is what the wine storage rack looks like on my kitchen island.  What does yours look like?

Xander and I had an entertaining conversation the other day:

X: I’m going to get married when I’m 18

Me: 18 huh?  Don’t you think you might want to wait a few years? You never know who you might meet.

X: (very matter-of-factly) But I’ve already picked!

Me: Oh really, who did you pick?

X: Katie.

Me: And did Katie pick you?

X: Yep.

Me: Well, what if you meet someone else in Kindergarten?

X: I won’t meet anyone in Kindergarten.

Me: What if you meet someone in 1st grade?

X: I won’t meet anyone in 1st grade.

Me: What if you meet someone in high school?

X: I won’t meet anyone in high school Mama.

Me: What if you meet someone in college?  I met Daddy in college.

Long pause

X: Ok, I’ll wait until college and then pick.

Me: What if that person doesn’t pick you?

X: Then I’ll marry Katie.

So that’s my 4 year old with his life all figured out.  Here is his Christmas list:

  • A Christmas tree for Parker’s room
  • A small (miniature) tree for his room
  • A house for his trains (no, not a train station – a house where he can take the trains apart and put them.  It’s a picture he has in his head…)

We’ve gotten the tree for Parker’s room taken care of, so I’ll be spending the next week or so trying to figure out how to creatively find a house for trains.

Oh, and try not to leave your step ladder up when hanging Christmas decorations or this might happen:

boys on ladder

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