Xander Week 108 – I’m Bigger?
March 10, 2009
Xander showing off how big he is
I think parents often experiment with a variety of methods to convince their children to do things. Sometimes we ask politely, other times we suggest, or attempt misdirection, or reverse psychology. Sometimes “racing” (i.e. I’ll race you to the changing table, who can get there first?) and sometimes exaggeration or even a little white lie. As Auntie Jenny mentioned, her mom used to tell her that the bath water was poisonous so that she would stop drinking it.
Our two-year old has some strong opinions on what is good food and what food he “can’t want”. This has presented us with an interesting challenge – how to make sure he’s eaten more than a starving child in a third world country. I’ve mentioned this in the past, and for the most part, Zach and I have taken a relaxed attitude – he eats, or he doesn’t, and we’re pretty sure he’ll eat enough to keep himself alive…
However, we recently discovered a nifty trick. Xander is interested in growing bigger. When we explained to him that eating a healthy dinner will help him grow bigger, he believed us. Now after every meal , Xander asks us “I grow bigger?” This is said in a gruff, growl voice, and he lifts his arms and shoulders to show us how much bigger he grew. And, in our ongoing efforts to nourish our son, we perpetuate this belief and agree, “Yes! I think you did grow bigger tonight!” Or, if he didn’t eat enough to keep a sparrow alive, “Nope, you didn’t eat enough to grow bigger tonight…” Most of the time, the incentive of growing bigger is enough to encourage him to eat an almost reasonable amount.
Unfortunately, Xander has translated this into the idea that everyone grows bigger when they eat, so when we’re done with dinner he says “Mama, you grew bigger!” Which in my head makes me think, “Yep, my hips, my butt, my belly, all growing bigger – that’s just great…” But my toddler can’t differentiate between taller and wider, so I simply smile and say “Yep, Mama ate all her dinner, so she gets to grow bigger too…”
There are so many things about Xander’s life that I want to remember, and not forget as he gets older. I want to remember how happy I felt when sitting in the rocking chair with him on a sunny day, just rocking and relaxing. I want to remember his “Wallace hands” – when he starts to get excited or upset he curls his fingers and wiggles his hands back and forth, palms up – an excellent rendition of Wallace from 
When I step back and look at where we are at in our lives – new baby, house, steady jobs, etc. I can see that Zach and I are full blown adults with all the responsibility that comes in that package. As I look around at our friends, I realized with a little surprise that we are not the only ones in this boat. Several of our friends are now in similar spots with their own mortgages, expanding families, and responsibilities coming out their ears. In my head, I’m still a recent college graduate, in regular contact with many of my college friends and we are all still in that relaxed college mindset.
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