Posts Tagged ‘child’
February 15, 2010
When Xander was this age:
He discovered the joys of wandering around while snacking. In Xander’s opinion, he always needed to have two of whatever he was eating – one in each hand. It was pretty cute to watch him toddling all over the house with a cheerio in each hand, and if he ate one, he’d come back for another – never satisfied being out of balance with just one hand filled.
Now this kid comes along:
He toddles around the house in a very similar manner as his brother. However, he’s taken this snacking while toddling thing one step further. Not only does he need a snack in each hand, but one in his mouth as well (don’t worry – we keep everything smaller than bit-sized to minimize choking risk). That’s my second son – he never does anything part way. I think “go big or go home” will someday be his motto… 
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Posted in Preschool Posts, Toddler Times | Tagged babies, Baby, baby development, baby steps, brothers, child, children, development, developmental milestones, family, mom, mommy, mother, motherhood, mothering, mothers, parent, parenting, parents, preschooler, snack, snacking, snacks, toddler, working mom | No Comments »
February 12, 2010
I think I might be a little too self-righteous when it comes to encroaching on family time. I have two recent examples:
Example one: An old friend was scheduled to come into town for a visit earlier this week. Plans had tentatively been made to meet up at a local bar/restaurant after work on Monday to catch up. The person making the plans was a little vague on the details, but since the location was family friendly, and I hadn’t seen this person in a long long time, Zach and I decided we’d be brave and have the kids tag along. So, Sunday night was full of preparation – I packed a diaper bag, and a bag of toys to hopefully keep the boys entertained. I prepared Xander for the following day’s plans. I carefully picked out clothing for school that wouldn’t accentuate the large amounts of food my kids manage to spill on themselves throughout the day. The next morning I packed a few remaining supplies – milk for Parker, a juice box for Xander, gummies for both of them. I continued mentioning Xander our plans for after school, and told him he could even have a “special” drink (a.k.a. shirley temple). 3pm rolls around, and I hear that plans have changed – they are no longer going to the family friendly location, but rather to one of the sketchier bars in town. Needless to say, there was no way I was bringing my kids to that bar. This made me so frustrated. Not only was I really looking forward to catching up with my old friend, but I had put so much effort into planning for the evening and I just knew tears would ensue when Xander found out we were not going to a restaurant and he would not have his special drink. I ended up sending off a short and rather snarky email – the location was shifted back and we all had a pleasant time visiting before the kidless crowd relocated themselves to the sketchier bar.
Example two: Wednesday night we arrived home at 5:30. At 5:40 Zach received an email from his boss with a request. After a follow-up to check the deadline, Zach learned that he had exactly one hour to finish the request. This threw our whole evening out of whack. My plans for a healthy meal – gone. My hope to help Xander with a thank-you note and Valentine’s Day Cards for school, not happening. Instead, I packed the boys back into the car (over many protests) and we drove to McDonald’s. We spent $12 for the three of us to eat fried crap and Xander to get a junky toy. An hour later, we drove back home (again). I understand that Zach’s job requires more than just 9-5 attention. I am completely supportive of his efforts to tweak scripts and research problems in the evenings and respond to emails nearly 24/7. What I couldn’t fathom was why Zach (and others in his office) had to drop everything from their evening routines to get a request done for 7pm on a Wednesday night. There was no 8pm meeting that I was aware of. And other than convenience for the boss to have some extra reading time, I couldn’t see any other logical explanation for the upheaval in our evening.
Twice this week my hackles have been raised by people without children failing to consider the massive amount of effort that goes into shifting plans or last minute requests. I feel like I’m being unreasonable – as one of my childless friends loves to remind me “kids are a choice” – and he’s completely right. I chose to have children, and I accept all of the responsibility and hassle that comes with that choice. But, I do get frustrated when others forget about the effort and hassle that I’m juggling.
Am I being unreasonable in expecting those without kids to remember the time and effort that goes into preparations for them? Should I just suck it up and continue juggling without complaint, or should I continue to remind people when they forget that it is more work and effort and some consideration is appreciated?
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Posted in General Info | Tagged babies, Baby, child, child free, childfree, childless, children, kid free, kidless, mom, mommy, mother, motherhood, mothering, mothers, parent, parenting, parents, preschooler, toddler, working mom | 6 Comments »
February 11, 2010
Each child has their own specific set of joys and challenges. I guess that’s what keeps us on our toes. With Xander, I sometimes worry that he is too sensitive, that he doesn’t stick up for himself and therefore it’s easier for him and his feelings to get trampled on. I was just getting used to this – to responding to Xander and encouraging him to be assertive where appropriate.
With Parker, it’s the exact opposite. Case in point: yesterday I arrived at day care to pick up the boys. I stopped to check in with Parker’s teacher, and while I was there, another little boy’s mother arrived. Parker was already in his coat and ready to go, but toddling around happily while I talked. When this mother help up her son’s coat to get him ready, he immediately laid face-down on the ground and began to cry. She and the teacher began discussing this new behavior of his while a little girl in the class helped the boy up off the floor. He continued to cry, but was standing. Parker toddled over with his arms out. I almost picked him up as he walked by, but he had his arms out like maybe he was going to hug this other little boy, so I let him go. What did he do you ask? He walked right up to this crying little boy with a big smile on his face and pushed him in the chest. I was mortified. I of course swooped Parker away and said “oh Parker, we don’t push, we hug” while demonstrating a hug. Parker may or may not have understood the lesson (I repeated it a few times) but it’s been sinking in with me for months. Our boy is rough and tumble through and through. He loves to push, pull, tug and hit. It doesn’t seem to matter how many times we remind him to be gentle or how many times we show him how to touch people gently. His first reaction is to hit. His behavior means that he is the child who is put into a pack ‘n play or a jump-a-roo to give the other kids in the room a break from him. Parker really believes that he is just playing, that his actions are all in fun, but of course they aren’t interpreted that way. We won’t give up, but this new kid with this new behavior is certainly proving to be a challenge for us!
How about the rest of you – do you have a hitter or a biter, and have you found any effective strategies in teaching them other methods of “playing”?
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Posted in General Info | Tagged babies, Baby, baby development, bullies, bully, bullying, child, children, day care, development, developmental milestones, family, mom, mommy, mother, motherhood, mothering, mothers, parent, parenting, parents, preschooler, toddler, working mom | 1 Comment »
February 8, 2010
We have been living inside a spelling bee for several weeks now. My day starts sometimes as early as 5:30 with a whisper in my ear, “Mama, how do you spell ‘window’?” and if I don’t respond, “Mama, how do you spell ‘couch’?” and it’ll keep going until I start spelling. In the car on the way to work I hear “Mama, how do you spell ‘tree’?” and “Mama, how do you spell ‘back hoe’?” or my personal favorite, “Mama, how do you spell ‘Signwithredinit’?” and “Mama, how do you spell ’somethingelse’?” And my favorite response – “Wow, that’s a weird word”
The worst part of the inescapable spelling bee is that I’m pretty sure Xander thinks we’re like seals. He asks and we perform. I’m not convinced that there is any sort of retention or learning going on when we spell. I think this because if you ask Xander to repeat what was just spelled, or even the first letter, he can’t (or won’t – not sure which) do it. Which then leaves me wondering at 8pm when I’m trying to get the little man to sleep and he’s asking me “Mama, how do you spell ‘bear’?” why do I keep going? I’m pretty sure it’s negative reinforcement, like when you pick up a phone to make it stop ringing, or pick up a tea kettle to get it to stop whistling. I wonder when (and how) we’ll get out of this never-ending spelling bee…
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Posted in Preschool Posts | Tagged babies, Baby, baby development, baby talk, child, children, development, developmental milestones, family, infant, infant development, infants, learning, mom, mommy, motherhood, mothering, mothers, parent, parenting, parents, preschooler, spell, spelling, spelling bee, toddler, working mom | 1 Comment »
February 5, 2010
I’m coming out of radio silence this week after juggling two rather sick boys for the week. It started last Sunday with two very cranky boys. We went for a drive to get out of the house – Xander of course needed to pee and for the first time ever, we got turned down when we asked to use a restroom. Where, you ask? The Campton Cupboard. They have zero sympathy for pee-pee dancing 3 year-olds, so don’t even try. Also, if you try to use the restroom in the Dunkin’ Donuts in Campton, be forewarned that it’s easier to pee outside than it is to try to skip in front of rude tourists in line.
Fast forward to several sleepless nights and two days home, first with Xander and then with Parker (who managed to catch another bout of RSV, complete with a 101.6 temperature and back onto nebulizer treatments). Parker is still waking up between 2:30 and 3:30 every morning for a few hours, and Xander is still crying every morning that he doesn’t feel good and doesn’t want to go to school (please note that by the time we arrive at school he is running to get inside and play with his friends, so we’re not taking those complaints too seriously).
Evenings have been EXHAUSTING. First, one kid will cry, and then before one of us can calm that one down, the other starts crying so we’ve had an almost constant flow of tears between the hours of 5pm and 8pm for the past 5 days. Yeah, I’m on my pity wagon – all are welcome! I’m hopeful that we’ll turn the corner this weekend and start to see more smiling and less crying.
Unfortunately, Xander has rediscovered his love of puzzles recently. He’s getting quite good at putting them together on his own. The biggest challenge is that Parker firmly believes that his primary role in our family is to pick up puzzle pieces and put them in boxes. He couldn’t care less if anyone else might have wanted to use that particular piece. This of course starts a great deal of arguments and the cycle continues until Parker goes to sleep. Ah, the joys of parenthood…
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Posted in General Info | Tagged babies, Baby, baby development, Campton Cupboard, child, children, Dunkin' Donuts, family, illness, infant, infant development, infants, mom, mommy, mother, motherhood, mothering, mothers, parent, parenting, parents, preschooler, RSV, sick, sick children, sick kids, toddler, working mom | 1 Comment »
