I survived 5 days as a single parent!
March 26, 2009
I have always had tons of admiration for single parents. Parenting is a tough job when there are two people around to share the burden. Taking all of that on by yourself can sometimes seems like an insurmountable task. More kids means the challenge starts to look a little more like Mission Impossible.
Last Saturday Zach flew to Philidelphia for a conference. I spent Saturday night and Sunday at my in-law’s house, which was a life saver because I had two extra sets of hands to help me with all of those tasks involved in parenting a toddler and an infant. Sunday night the three of us traveled home, and began a 3 day adventure in single parenting. Sunday night wasn’t very difficult since both kids were asleep by the time we got home. I wisked Xander to bed, left Parker sleeping in his car seat and spent the next hour prepping everything I could for the next day. I think I went a little preparation crazy as I not only picked out clothes for the three of us, and packed diaper bags but I also emptied the dishwasher, cleaned and re-filled the pellett stove, set out supplies for tea and pulled out cereal bars for breakfast.
Monday morning went pretty smoothly – Parker took a nap in his bassinet after nursing and Xander and I got up and ready to go, then we woke Parker up and the three of us trundled off to day care and work. Monday evening was a different story. While Xander rarely exhibits any jealousy towards Parker, he decided Monday night that he needed undivided mommy time. Over a month ago I had arranged for our local babysitter to come home with me after school and be an extra set of hands for a few hours. Unfortunately, she learned late last week that her first tennis practices were Monday and Tuesday so she bailed on me. I can’t really blame her – she’s a freshman in high school, and trying to fit in and start a new sport is tough enough without missing the first two practices. At any rate, I had lost my helper, so I attempted to jiggle Parker and Xander. Parker was fussy, but every time I picked him up, Xander would dissolve into tears. If I put Parker down to comfort Xander, he would start screaming as well. Both of the boys screamed and cried for pretty much an hour straight that evening. I was ready to plop everyone in the car and drive to Philidelphia at that point. Finally, I convinced Xander that if I could get Parker calmed down, he would sleep and I would have time to spend with him. This happened, and I managed to cook some spaghetti (which Xander refused to eat…) and the rest of our evening went relatively smoothly. Then Xander peed through his diaper about 3am, necessating a change of clothes, and Parker woke up at 4am wanting to eat, so sleep was fleeing on Monday night.
Tuesday morning went pretty well (again with lots of prep work after the boys fell asleep on Monday night). Tuesday evening was a little better as well. We splurged on Chinese food, so I didn’t have to worry about cooking. A friend came over with her 8 year old son for dinner, which was a nice distraction. Since Xander needed a bath, we did that before company arrived. We’ve been slowly working on potty training with Xander, but he isn’t expressing much interest in using the big boy potty, and we aren’t forcing the issue. So, after I filled the tub and got Xander undressed, I asked him if he needed to use the potty. He said no, so in he went. About two minutes later he stood up in the tub, and I could see that he needed to get on that toilet a.s.a.p. So, I flipped up the lid, spun around, lifted him out of the tub and onto the toilet. Unfortunately, I was not swift enough. Not only was there poop in the tub, but also on the floor, on the toilet, on Xander and on me… While I stood there waiting for Xander to finish up on the toilet, he peed on me as well (my son – always thorough…) So, after a wardrobe change for me and a clean towel wrapped around Xander, I emptied the tub, threw the toys in the sink to be scrubbed, then scrubbed the tub, refilled it, and plopped Xander back in it for a second attempt. This whole time of course, Parker is screaming in frustration that no one is paying attention to him. Never a dull moment, right? Luckily, the rest of the evening went much more smoothly.
By Wednesday the three of us were starting to settle into a routine – lots and lots of work for mommy, holding a boy in each arm, and much less sleep, but we were surviving, and there were no real fiascos on Wednesday. Zach got home about 8pm on Wednesday evening and other than over-sleeping Thursday morning, thing seem to be getting back to normal. I know I can manage single parenthood in small bursts if I have to, but it is a heck of a lot more work and I’m not looking forward to a repeat performance anytime soon. I can’t imagine being a single parent permanently – I have so much respect for parents who do it all the time.
Babies don’t have many favorite activities – sleeping and eating seem to round out the list for quite a long time. Sometime around 2 or 3 months, they start to get a little more interactive. Parker has decided that his newest favorite activity is having “coo conversations”. I talk to Parker all the time, and when we make eye contact, he seems to watch what I’m doing. However, when he coos and I coo back at him, he smiles and wiggles and becomes much more engaged in the activity. This has lead to regular “coo conversations” in our house – even Xander gets involved sometimes. It’s not always the most exciting conversation, but it’s lots of fun to see how much enjoyment Parker gets from it, and as the experts say, we’re hopefully setting him up for good language and conversation skills down the road. So, for now, two languages can be heard in our house – English, and Baby Coo (though Parker is the only one who can interpret the latter…)
So, 
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