Baby Week 17 - Movement, VBAC Update and Downs Syndrome Testing
July 29, 2008
17 week fetus
Apparently I have a lot to talk about this week, so I’ve mashed it all into one post. First, movement! I’m certain I’m now feeling movement, which is much earlier than the last time around. It’s not very regular yet, and sort of feels like that drop in your stomach when you hit a hill in a roller coaster or a steep road. I’m expecting the “kicks” to feel more like kicks in the upcoming weeks.
A VBAC update. I’ve decided to have another c-section. Ironically, it was Abby’s comment in my original post that helped me figure out what I really wanted to do. I think subconsciously I was already leaning towards c-section, but I wanted to make sure that I had carefully considered my options. Abby said that she thought with her second child she would opt for a VBAC, as she had a short-ish labor (5 hours) but a rather lengthy and painful recovery. I was the exact opposite. I had a long and miserable labor, but my recovery was quick and relatively painless. This helped me to realize that I’m much more comfortable doing that again than I am with an unpredictable labor. Those of you who know me know that I am not a spontaneous person. I like my life to be orderly and planned. In fact, I’ve already started making arrangements for my maternity leave even though it’s still over 4 months away. The idea of having everything planned before the next baby arrives is appealing and comforting to me. The thought of surgery is not overly concerning, and if my recovery is like the last one, then I should be feeling pretty good in a week or so after the event. I haven’t had a chance to discuss this with my doctors yet. My next appointment is August 21st, so hopefully they’ll be able to give me some more details at that point.
Speaking of my doctor’s appointment, I completed the “optional” additional testing my doctor’s office offers for downs syndrome and other various birth defects. The test is simply a vial of blood drawn. We did this with Xander during the last pregnancy. I stressed about it a little the last time, and started down the “what if” path. Luckily, Zach pulled me back to reality, and we decided not to even discuss other options until we had more information. Xander was of course perfect, so we never had to have discussions about “what if our child has a birth defect?” In my mind, this test was not optional for us. Regardless of the results, I want to know as much about my child as soon as possible. Even if the baby has downs syndrome, it’s something that I want to be prepared for - research, read books, talk to people and most importantly, prepare my family ahead of time. I don’t know how I would react to those faces that would initially be excited for us, and then look at us with pity. I want everyone to be happy about his baby’s arrival, and I don’t want any surprise that could have been prevented to detract from that happiness. I suppose that parents have reasons for choosing not to know - similar to those who chose to wait to find out the gender until the baby is born. I am just having a hard time figuring out why parents would make the decision not to know…
Well, my husband and I never got any of those tests for 2 reasons. First - we wouldn’t have aborted the child anyway and, second - we felt that there was no reason to find out something and worry about it if there was nothing we could do to change the outcome. We figured that we should enjoy the pregnancy and assume all was well unless we were given a reason otherwise. To each his/her own I guess! Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy.
Charlotte and I felt the same as Katie, but only realized it after our quad-screen came back with a 1 in 19 chance of Down syndrome. (This was later lowered to 1 in 38 chance after a second round of tests.) We thought about it a lot a lot and met with a geneticist at Dartmouth. We knew we would love our baby no matter what and we would not consider an abortion, and the initial development of the baby is the same whether or not he has Down syndrome (save for some possible health issues).
If we decide to have a second child, I think we’ll skip the quad-screen and save ourselves the worry.
Having a bro with Downs, and where he is now 30, so think havnig a Downs baby 30 years ago, now there are so many more options. Reading Katie’s and Adam’s reply, I think the test is definitely a good idea for you specifically Sara, so that you CAN read up on it. Being in control, especially with a pregnancy where you lose so much to your body and can’t control ANYTHING, for you, I think being able to read 3 additional books would be a good thing
Though I do know that while I don’t know if we would get the test or no, we also would not abort.
There have been some excellent viewpoints addressed in the comments here. I think Jenny (knowing me quite well) is correct that for me personally, being able to read and research any sort of birth defect would help me to better handle and understand my child once they were born. It is also important to me that my family be prepared for that sort of situation. I would be crushed if any of them felt pity or sadness upon seeing the newest addition to the ranks. Being able to talk about and prepare my family for the possibility of a birth defect ahead of time is a big factor in why I chose to have the testing done.