Dear Mom,
May 8, 2009
It’s that time of year again when we’re supposed to remind you how much we love an appreciate you. I hope that you don’t really need a reminder. I hope that I am appropriately expressing my love and gratitude on a regular basis. I also know that you don’t really need this reminder. I know this, because I don’t really need the reminder from my children either.
Mothers and daughters have a special relationship. We can at times be so similar, and at other times disagree so strongly. Our relationship has evolved over time, and it has certainly had it’s ups and downs. As with most children, becoming a parent changed my perspective on parents, and mothers in particular. I understand more now, I see more and my recollections of my childhood have a new perspective as well.
I have so many fond memories of my childhood – collecting and waxing leaves with you for a fall centerpiece on our dining room table. Coming inside after playing in the snow for the afternoon and drinking hot cocoa with you. Decorating our Christmas tree year after year. These memories are the reason I work so hard to create similar ones for my children. Life isn’t always happy and easy, but I want the happy memories to outweigh the unpleasant ones. They do for me, and that is what I want for my children.
What I didn’t realize growing up, and couldn’t understand until now is that my entire childhood you were teaching me how to become a parent. You were not only teaching me, but also teaching your future grandchildren. Your legacy lives on in them. And realizing this, I now understand that the things I teach my children will be passed along to my grandchildren – and what an enormous responsibility that is! But it is also a wonderful opportunity.
So I guess what I’m trying to say Mom, is that I love you, and thank you for teaching me to be a good parent. And also, that I know these words are unnecessary since parental love does not require reciprocation, but it certainly is nice to know that someone remembers all those dinners you cooked, and all those games you watched, and all those presents you wrapped and everything in between and that every single moment was worth the effort you put in because it made me who I am today, and it’s helping to shape your grandchildren as well. You are an amazing parent, and I am proud to be your daughter.
I love you mom.
“Life isn’t always happy and easy, but I want the happy memories to outweigh the unpleasant ones.”
That is really important Sara. Thank you for that. I think that is important to keep in mind as many people face hard times. I never want Emily to feel my stresses or worries because she is just a kid but I think you put it perfectly. I hope my daughter looks back and remembers her childhood the way you remember yours (and I remember mine). Xander and Parker seem to have a wonderful Mommy in you as well. I enjoy your blog. Keep it up!
Mary B.