All My Bags Are Packed, but I’m Not Sure I Want To Go…
March 14, 2007
Zach and I are going to Las Vegas this week. We’re leaving on Thursday, and coming back the following Thursday. Zach is attending a conference out there, and I’m tagging along. We planned this about a year ago, and purchased the tickets well before Xander was born. It’s a good thing we got the tickets back then, or I think I would have backed out of the whole trip by now.
Xander is going to stay with relatives while we are gone. All of the relatives are perfectly capable of taking care of an infant, but even the knowledge that they are capable parents does not allieviate my nervousness in leaving Xander behind.
I don’t have any interest in gambling, and Las Vegas was not in my top ten list of places to visit, but Zach has the free hotel room (and it’s a really nice hotel!), and the free plane ticket, and his food is paid for. In terms of vacation costs, this is definitely a cheap one. I’m very excited about 6 full nights of uninterrupted sleep. In fact, this is the biggest selling point for me – uninterrupted sleep. I realize that I could have that without the cost of flying someplace, but it just worked out this way.
So this week I’m wrestling between my guilt of leaving my child with other caretakers, my worry that although these caretakers are perfectly competent and love my son, they aren’t me, and won’t be able to comfort Xander the way that I do, and excitement about some time with my husband, a vacation for the two of us, and a week of good sleep.
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I forgot to mention it in my email. Have a great time on your trip!(well as much as you can in Vegas). I am sure the uninterrupted sleep will make it well worth it, and like you said: your relatives are perfectly competent. I am sure Xander will do fine.
I know exactly how your feel. I hate leaving Cameron anytime. I was faced with having to spend the night in the hospital the other night and I had to go home first. I was almost in tears. In the 17 months since we had Cameron, we have been away I think twice without him, and it was three day weekends and then an occasional overnight. It was so hard, I know you are going to miss Xander so much, but call and check on him. I did, I think more than once a day. I don’t care if my parents/relatives think I am overbearing, I miss my child and that is it. Do what you need to do to have a fun and relaxing vacation!
Lee Anne
Hi Melissa and Lee Anne – thanks for the comments
We did have a wonderful time, and Xander did fine (and yes, I did check on him daily). It was so nice to get back though!!